What expectations do you have before seeing the object? Slightly nervous that my object(s) would represent how you view me, but am holding in my mind that the object might be more about how I would react to it. What is your immediate response when opening it? Initially, disappointment. The unusable double ended spoon, the large flat stone, the overlarge gum stuck with too many teeth; knowing that these things were made for me specifically suggests that they all contain a subtext of how I am perceived, and that fact confirms my thoughts about the things I don't like about myself. The stone with the white shapes (they could be screwed up pieces of paper from a distance, or discarded chewing gum collected in a huddle, like the spot on the underside of a school desk where now flavourless gum is hidden), hold less fascination for me than the stone/spoon. Both elements seem made from the same material, there's less to explore, less conversation, except I wonder if it has a purpose - is it a functional tool? - a primitive representation of a molar used for grinding and separating husks of corn perhaps. I want to dip it in ink and draw with it, long arcs of decaying parallel lines, multiple writing. The stone/spoon feels built to confound but the juxtaposition of textures, the rough and the smooth - is really tactile and pleasing to hold. It only really sits large spoon down so that the small end of the spoon projects upwards like a neck, the other way up is really unnatural, it won't sit 'flat'. Also, holding it the right way up by the small end spoon is very satisfying - I'm not sure if the spoon has been crushed smooth by the stone or is the spoon cradling the stone. What would I use it for? - a base for a candle, I can visualise the flatter side of the stone pooling and spilling threads of wax - perhaps it's a perch for a finch in the garden, an abstract platform for an brief avian conversation, but picking up the stone and holding the flat side face down in my palm, it could be a tool for picking stones out of boot tread, or realigning a bicycle tyre, or even a weapon - a horrible brass gouger with an end that's been melted, folded and hardened by heat. How do you feel about this object being made for you? Honoured.
0 Comments
What expectations do you have before seeing the object?
A glove! – Not sure why it just popped into my head a few days ago. I think it’s going to be heavy – this is in response to comments made at a past SCVA event where we had to pick random boxes with objects in, when I picked a heavy box I felt reassured I had made a good choice, but was disappointed when I picked a lighter one. I am unsure of its status: Is it a kind of Totem – a sacred art object of/for me? Or a portrait, a surreal object based interpretation of myself? Or a physical manifestation of my experience/ feeling towards learning? Is it a catalyst between myself and other artwork, a kind of intermediary object? What is your immediate response when opening it? Instead of trying to decode / write coherently about this I thought it best to just list words/phrases from my train of thought as they first came to me. Tactile - Lumber – like a model of a wood pile from a builders merchants – potential – kit – build – Lego! Curve/Nook/neck – face, I definitely see a face. The right way up is with the coloured end face down the silver and red thimbles becoming eyes and the blue one is a mouth. – Awkward, I want to put a finger into each thimble and hold it like a bowling ball but it feels too awkward, and I can’t bowl it! - Colour, its hidden face down, is this about my work in that there used to be lots of colour but now none, hidden? Also colour appears unmixed, straight out of the tube, a primary element ready to be refined/mixed Thimbles, craft, feminine – Warm Layers – stronger at front (face) but infilled with fragmented/splintered parts further back. I now feel it’s a kind of psychological portrait of me/my practice as an artist, it has a do it yourself, unpolished finish – more about the idea than execution – not precise! Colour is hidden – building and construction are its core, I almost feel it is like an unbuilt shed. – In fact I feel like I want to build something from it and almost feel frustrated it’s all stuck together. How do you feel about this object being made for you? Before opening it: Anxiety – I have been psychoanalysed, what is the result! Pressure – to feel a connection to it Appreciated - it’s nice to have something made for you, time and thought has gone into it, its personal unique. After opening it: Psychoanalysed I do feel a connection/empathy with it Work I feel I want to make in response: I want to reinterpret it in Lego – maybe this is so that it can be changed/adapted and is not fixed. Using the same amount of similar wooden parts I want to build/ create some kind of much larger structure, an abstract framework, and sit it next to the original. I’m thinking Naum Gabo but without the sophistication! I hope this rambling has helped – more to follow tomorrow! Kind regards Lloyd On the 3rd of November, I met Laura and Jo at the SCVA. This meeting was to the first opportunity to discuss the objects I had made for them and their expectations, thoughts and relationships with these seemingly odd and bespoke objects.
Before. I felt nervous that morning. I felt the expectations of others as I have spoken about before but also that my focus on them and the closeness of my material making and thinking to them (although they were not present). There is something gentle and profound that is happening within these encounters. The encounters that I am identifying as both material- human and non-human- I know I am enmeshed in a process and wonder how I can expect that to be as profound for those taking part. I keep thinking about the performativity of pedagogy and the particular performativity within my research. It is a strange choreography of patterns repeated and new – we are all moving together with thoughts and reactions but not in straight line- rather a fluctuating rhythm of shapes and interrelating movements. I want to reference two different phrases that link to this gathering of people and the relational correspondences of our thoughts and actions. One is the ‘dance of attention’ (Manning and Massumi, 2014 p 6) where they describe ‘the making-felt of a co-compositional force that does not yet seek to distinguish between human and non human, subject and object, emphasising instead the immediacy of mutual action, and associated milieus of their emergent relation.’ This infiltrating of states and beings is where I understand the nature of reciprocity to form within the framework of pedagogical encounters. It is the navigation of others but crucially being able to ‘hold others in mind’ whilst being active and responsive at the same time. We knit without a pattern, but we are forming something and somethings that functions in ways that we are yet to know and that Atkinson would refer to as ‘yet to come’ p63 disobedience. This brings me to the second phrase; ‘developing ways of living attentively with learners’ (Atkinson, 2017 p 16). This attention is becoming more focussed and necessary within this research. The pedagogy is in the relationship and the listening closely to the experiences and exchanges that come to form. I feel I am standing right next to the individuals that jo, Laura, mark and Lloyd, Sophie are speaking and acting, close-up magnified, with higher volumes and colours than normal. I almost – more than see – more than her and in turn more than make. I will go on to explore this critically thinking critical looking bad critical making but it is an amplified experience. I was conscious of how they may feel or not feel this attentiveness. However, it is not my intention that the attentiveness id a burden for them- my intention is that the attentiveness opens something for them or ‘remaining open to the not known’. (Atkinson, 2017 p 60) I had initially thought that I would speak to Laura and jo separately before coming together and sharing objects, however I reconsidered this and decided that I would ask them what they wanted to speak together or alone. They arrived separately with their boxes in the arms and I feel odd. I am so used to arriving at a space with numerous objects and boxes and devices that I often feel like a pack horse or a peddler – with my wares. I am conscious of the weight of materials, of material encounters. Materiality is cumbersome it is surrounding and encompassing. I was interested in seeing the objects again and whether the fact that they had been posted and left my studio and entered their domain before being introduced to the gallery environment would change the relationship jo and Laura had to them. Through the domestic context, the objects first connections and considerations were the individuals not an art work or exhibition but themselves. What did they see when they opened the boxes and saw the objects could they see themselves. I was thinking back to the questions of affordance and what these objects afforded, what work they had to do and what they stood for? I would by the end of this if the objects are tired or always ready to function- alert. Jo's object was delivered to her house by hand as she is more local to me. I left the box outside her door in the porch. When I got home I waited. I have waited alot this week aware of hearing from the group and wondering what they think. What is interesting and unexpected is that I had imagined that they all would let me know what they thought straight away as they opened and encountered the objects but I realise or believe that there is a pressure built up by the objects arrival. The expectation of what it is and whether they like it or if they understand it. I imagine that they feel obligated to like it. Through all my meetings with them they have been very honest and frank in their feelings and reactions to objects that I have made or shown them and that they have used. They can reject and they have license to do so as the objects aren’t personally loaded for them. They are presented and performed for the first time with me and by me. This time the performance is different but there is a different level of theatratrics involved, the presentation is in the opening of the boxes. When working together as a group thoughts can be automatically shared and responses are changed or filtered through the dialogue with everyone else. It is the saherd dialogue that enables the more direct engagement and reaction that can be discussed or acted on togather. They are complicit in the scenario that is normal for them created by the experiences within the sessions. Now however they are singular and the free flow of theor reactions may be internalised or shared with family as the object is located within the domestic domain. In the emails that I had to say the objects had arrived it is interesting that they do not immediately open the boxes – I am interested in the time that it sits unopened in theor houses. Mark remarked in his email that ‘Yes I’ve received the package you sent and it remains unopened on a chair in my studio until I can get a free moment to sit with it and answer your questions correctly’ and in a second email ‘Will dive into the box later like it’s Christmas, and feed back to you my thoughts’ I am interested that Mark used the word ‘correctly’, as how does he perceive that he will answer the questions correctly. I want to discuss with him how he perceives the questions and the thought they are answered appropriately. What I imagine is that he means he wants to give it time but I wonder about the relationship between his first email where the box remains unopened and the thoughtful moment he imagines to open the box and in comparison his second email where he says he will dive in and it is like Christmas. I am very aware of what they might think I want them to say, do and think. This could restrict their responses or they may filter what they feel to what they think I want to hear. However, the objects aren’t mine and this is a position I have repeated many times before. They are for someone, somewhere else. I know I am embedded into the objects through my making, through the conversations, how do we measure that? I have had students say to me many times that I am in their heads, some often making jokes that I am with them when they sit down for a meal or when they go on holiday. Of course, what they mean is that my questions are with them. Now have I made concrete conversations? The end point of these objects is not the opening – or the reveal - it is the disentangling of their matter, their relevance, their rejection, their investment that continues to allow them to form beyond my head and hands. Laura followed a similar pattern in her emails and again I was left for two days between her saying it had arrived and her saying she had tried to guess what it was. 1st response: Thank you for sending the object. I received it today. I haven’t opened it yet but will soon. 2nd response: I tried to guess what the object was. Only thing I guess correctly was that multiple colours were involved. What for me is so interesting is that Laura says that she guessed correctly there would be multiple colours …but why? In her written responses to my earlier questions of what learning looks or feel like she mentions, paint ‘Probably oil painting mostly, although any type of painting can easily slip back into feeling like you are new to the medium. There is always so much more to learn about painting.’ But no mention of colour unless implied for her my saying painting, she goes on to talk about food and spaghetti but again no colour mentioned until I ask what tone, temperature, volume learning experiences might be and she says ‘burgundy’. I am fascinated by her reading of the object and the process of guessing. She says nothing else and I want to hold on to the truth of her feelings towards the rather odd object before she hears the narrative of its production as I believe that the romance of the object being a pallete will fuel its status, but these are my assumptions in a place of not yet knowing. Jo: Lovely square box received, thank you. Yet to open! |
Kimberley FosterKimberley's practice as an artist is pedagogical, it doesn’t just reference learning, it plays with, embodies and encourages learning at its core. The objects consider ideas of collaboration and authorship, discussions about touch and encounter, and bring into active consideration issues of learning within social and participatory practices. Archives
October 2018
Categories |